Because I started talking more and more about unconditional love, I feel for some time the need to write an article in which to express my perspective on what authentic unconditional love means.
As strange as it may seem, the two are not equivalent. Unconditional love does not mean unconditional acceptance of everything.
Unconditional love comes from a great and profound place inside us. It’s bigger than anything, because it’s the beginning of everything. It is the frequency of our cells, it is the energy of Home. In fact, it is the natural state of our soul.
The separation wound and the centuries of earthly conditioning have made this type of Love appear to be something far away from us and our essence. That is Illusion.
And that’s the mission of some of us. To remove this veil of illusion and incorporate the fact that unconditional love is our natural state.
What is dangerous, however, is to try to manifest unconditional love in a mechanical way. Without the support of the structures of our personality, of our ego and of who we are in the 3D dimension. Just for the sake of showing to ourselves and to others that we are spiritual.
This is not unconditional love and my belief is that it actually takes us away from our real essence.
So here are some ideas about what unconditional love does not mean:
- unconditional love does not mean to have no limits or to not express yourself when something seems inappropriate to you
- does not mean to be a door mat in front of the other
- is not self-abuse
- unconditional love does not mean to accept unconditionally the toxic behaviours of the other, when these behaviours affect you
Unconditional love means you love. Period. You do not love because the other is this way or the other, or it offers you safety and comfort or it gives you this or that. You just love.
It is such a high energy that it is hard to fit this frequency into what we have learned about love being children and living in society.
But we all have parts of us that can not sustain this energy in everyday life. And then we need to understand: The soul loves unconditionally, our wounds do not.
We need to pay attention to these injuries, so that we can manifest authentic unconditional love. If you have an injured inner child who is able to do anything to get love from the other in order not to face the fact that he/she feels unworthy of love, then this part of you cannot sustain the energy of unconditional love.
This part of you will give and give and give. It will put aside its own needs and limits, in order to please others and not be rejected. It will accept anything to prove itself that he/she deserves love. This is not unconditional love. This is self-abuse.
Unconditional love in concrete manifestation
We need to heal these parts from us, in order to make room for the pure energy of unconditional love. From which, at the soul level, you love whatever the other person does or does not.
At the same time, it does not mean you agree and take upon yourself the other’s toxic behaviour, just because you’re afraid of rejection.
Unconditional love is to see the other in the soul, in it’s real potential, every moment. You cannot do this until you see yourself that way. And you do not have to take upon ourself the moments when the other is not aligned with himself and manifests toxic behaviours.
You can be there for him in unconditional love, helping him to make his way to himself. Without agreeing with the ways in which he tricks himself. But having compassion for him every moment.
Inner mastery in unconditional love
It takes a lot of inner mastery to keep the other in your heart in unconditional love, while putting limits on its behaviours not aligned to the Source. Or to the parts of him that do not agree with who he really is, in his essence.
And it requires maturity, balance and complete trust in Divine Love and its transformational capacity.
You can do this when you get to that place where you do not need anything from the other, because you have everything through your connection with the Source.
This does not mean emotional closure, but it means opening up to the highest love possible, to the highest degree. And then you can let the energy of divine love pass through you, in order to find yourself and to go to the other in an authentic way.
And if the other is on the same frequency and has done its part of healing, then you can create together Heaven on Earth.